Spring, Week 9 - The Elf and the Sphinx

To hear the narration and learn how I put the episode together, check out the video:

*****

 I don't normally leave an entry on a cliffhanger but I did in my last one. And at the time I did wonder what the night would bring! It had already been a day full of learning new things, seeing new places, being chased by an entirely new (to me, anyway) creature... so no wonder if I wondered what else would happen or be revealed! And to be fair, a couple of things were revealed after that last entry (and something that had happened that I didn't squeeze into my journal last time).

MouseEye told me about the nature of flying brooms, especially the old ones. The newer ones are made for anyone to fly - they're quite generic. But the old ones - they were built in a way that, if you didn't resonate with it, it'd present as a perfectly ordinary broom, or at least as a "nothing-particularly-special" flying broom. How awesome it is that this old broom, Vapour Trail, did resonate with me.

Speaking of the broom, and Pop... throughout the night, Pop (the one attached to Vapour Trail) continued to divide and flow and morph. It was like watching festive lights multiply and grow all over a tree! The handle now glows, very gently, with all of its twisted, knotted, mottled glory. The entirety of her bristles now also glow amber and there are definitely far more "light bristles" than there were original ones. The overall result is just... completely magical! I have to share with Pip - maybe this is a way to keep Pop O'Locks safe in whatever dimensions they exist!

However, reality also came knocking and reminded me that, while flying fast and high in the open sun can be fun, it's also a source of skin burn. Sun burn, wind burn... oof, my skin wasn't happy! It took a couple of days for a lovely brown tan to develop. The colour is reminiscent of smooth tree bark!

During the couple of days that I took it easy, waiting for my skin to recover, MouseEye gave me a note from Pip! I grinned when I saw it, then grimaced when my cheeks pushed their burned selves up, then groaned when the grimace creased those same burnt areas!

Note to Self - I need a salve for this!

But back to the note. I read it and... I learned something new.

My dearest bestest friend Sweet

Your world sounds like a scary place. I can't imagine living through all of the adventures you've shared with me. You are so brave. Sweet the Brave!!!

My life is much quieter than yours, thankfully, but your life sounds more like an adventure book! Mine would be more of a "how to avoid..." I'm more of a hide and run than hide and seek person. :)

I'm happy to hear Pop is doing so well. She is extinct in most dimensions (of the here not here). I'm hoping ours survive - thrive and breed!

How did you learn to write poetry? I love reading yours. 

MouseEye has been visiting often - she does love chocolate chunky chip cookies especially fresh from my oven. LOL. I'm sending some for you too. (If none arrive, you know who swiped them) LOL. 

Love Your best bestie

Pip

 Pip called me adventurous! Me! I had to laugh. No, Pip, I'm not adventurous, but they do seem to find me regardless! And she said she likes my poetry! Well... I'll have to write one. I just need to think what about. Or maybe I can write one about how MouseEye seems to have developed a keen interest in chocolate chunky chip cookies! Apparently Pip sent them with this letter but they didn't arrive. Or... they did but I just never got them!

When I read the bit about the cookies, I looked over the letter at where MouseEye was sitting, looking all cute and innocent. But I think he felt my glare because he opened his eyes, gave a weak smile, belched a chocolate-laden burp, patted his tummy, then closed his eyes again. Little scamp! Cookie thief!

Ah - to heck with it - I can't stay mad at him for long. But I did say I'd appreciate at least one cookie next time. He made a sound back that could have been agreement, or a light snore, or perhaps even something less polite. 

I do remember seeing him eating a cookie in Pip's pocket while I dreamed that night after being under the effects of the mushroom spores. I wonder just how much of that experience was real? I'm guessing more of it than I'd guessed.

Anyway, I was finally feeling good again after recovering from my burn, ready to take on the day, whatever it might bring, embrace the fullness of...

"Somebody's coming down the path."

... the... fullness of... *sigh* ... time to breathe, time to relax, time to trust in myself, whatever may happen, embrace the fullness of the spirit of the cottage and grounds and...

*Knock knock* "Hello? Mistress Sweetwater?"

I opened my eyes when I recognized the voice. Cornelius McTwitter, the physician of High Rannoc, here.

"Mistress?"

But there was something wrong with his voice. It was like he was talking around something. I opened the door as he was starting to turn away. "Ah! Good! Mistress. I'm so glad you're in."

"Doctor", I responded politely. -ish. I mean... he wants to kick me out of my cottage and turn the grounds into some sort of "health resort", whatever that is. 

"I... ah... can I come in?" And then he smiled, revealing a broken tooth. I stepped out of the way and indicated a seat.

"How did your tooth end up broken?"

He gave a wan smile. "It's... there's quite the thing happening in town. Have you heard?"

"Are you referring to the supposed relationship between myself and the mayor?"

"Not exactly that, but that is part of it. High Rannoc is abuzz about the rumoured affair, some defending you, some attacking, and many just listening raptly, soaking up the, and pardon me for saying, entertainment value. Bob was targeted by some people for having sold you that magnificent broom you flew out on the other day. Anyway, things were getting pretty animated, people began grabbing and swinging heavy things, and my tooth and I met one of those heavy things on a backswing. I dosed myself with pain killers and am now here, hoping you can set my tooth aright."

I took a look in the book and there was a recipe for Shattered Tooth. And I had everything in house. I did consider, briefly, going out to collect reagents and letting the doctor sit and stew, but instead I decided to make a potion now. And to ask a few questions while I worked.

"The mayor did mention to me that you are interested in taking the cottage and converting it into some sort of health spot." It was a statement on the surface but a question at its heart.

"When I first was here and you treated me, I must admit that my mind couldn't accept that you'd cured me. And so efficiently and effectively. I blame that on my bias against nature-based medicines, which I was taught in my medical school in Imperial City. "Treat the humours, not the body!" was an oft-repeated asservation."

"A what?"

"A... it was something the instructors would say but never provide evidence that it was correct. We all learned it as more an article of faith than of science."

"And then you came here, and..."

"And you showed me just what a fool I was! You brew a potion and almost instantly the patient is cured. I am aware you helped young Robert, our town's adventurer."

I'd had the Rat Spit on a low boil and added it to the Vampire Venom and Slimeshell (both raw) and now let it sit and cool. "So you don't want to take over here?"

"Goodness, no! I say you should provide your kind of care here in your cottage and I'll provide mine safely behind city walls."

"So why did the mayor say he wants me out and you in here?"

The doctor shook his head. "I don't know. But I'm not interested in displacing you."

I handed over the cup. "You'll want to kick this back in one go. Swirl it in your mouth before you swallow."

He accepted gratefully and did as I asked.

"Look, you are part of the medical... team, if I may be so bold to say. You provide your services and I provide mine and that way High Rannoc citizens can be as healthy as they can be." And then he added, "Oooh... it tingles."

As he opened his mouth, I could see the tooth regenerating. It's one thing to get rid of someone's bad breath with a potion, but it's something else entirely to see a tooth growing. Literally growing.

"I have to ask - are you still trying to get an animated skeleton?"

He grimaced at that one. "No - I've learned my lesson. I have an ordinary skeleton and I point to where I need to direct attention. I figured if you don't need one, neither do I!"

"It should be another few minutes. Try to not rub your tongue over the tooth."

"This is extraordinary. Had someone come to me with a broken tooth, I'd've been pulling it out and perhaps replacing it with some sort of bone. Elephant, perhaps."

I decided to ask one last question before the tooth was fully healed. "Any idea who's helping the rumour along? Is the mayor saying drunken things again?"

Cornelius looked serious this time. "That's... quite a thought... I hadn't considered that there'd be someone adding fuel to the flame, so to speak. I mean, you know the nature of rumours and how they morph and change - enlarge, I suppose, you could say - and that's something I think everyone partakes in. But you're asking about someone being malicious about it. I don't think so. The mayor is saying nothing but looking rather smug, his wife is crying that another woman has led him astray, the teachers and staff are tittering at each other. I just don't know."

"What was that about the mayor's wife?"

"Oh, apparently the mayor's been accused of straying from the marital bed in the past."

"Ah." Something didn't feel right, but I wasn't sure what it was. So I decided to let the doctor know how much he owed (Forty silver! Because it was a harder potion) and move on with the day.

The thought of people getting violent, let alone spreading vicious rumours about me, was uncomfortable. I needed some time away again. Exercise in the bog had been one solution, retail therapy leading to a trip to The Cloud Isles had been another. Today, I wanted to walk among the trees in Glimmerwood Grove. We, MouseEye and I, could spend a day doing it, maybe gathering a thing or two, and maybe... hey! We can visit that elf that MouseEye had found the other day! Fun!

"MouseEye, what do you think about a day trip visit to the elf you visited the other day? Fun, right?"

He just froze and had this... look... that said so much and none of it good. I kept looking at him. He gave me a weak smile back. "Must we?"

"Just out of curiosity, what would cause any concern about visiting the elf? It sounded like he was eager for visitors."

MouseEye's face was frozen. Through closed lips I got a mumbled, noncommittal sound.  

Deep breaths, count to ten, tell myself that some day I'll find the funny in this situation, release. "How about this? If we go visit the elf, do you think we'll be welcomed?"

Another noncommittal sound.

"Ok, great. Well, I'm off. It'd be great if you came along to guide me to the elf, rather than have me wander around trying to find him, but if it's going to be, for whatever reason, impractical for you to accompany me, I fully and non-judgementally understand."

"I guess..."

"I mean, if whatever happened between you and the elf is going to be a hinderance to helping guide me there, then it's completely fine that you not come."

"Yes, I..."

"Because in your telling of the tale, and I am heavily referring to your use of both the words for the long appendage that is part of you and a synonym for a story, you were so amazingly clever that you won the elf's favour."

"Well... I did..."

"So off I go and I won't come home until I've met the elf for myself, if for no other reason than to get his side of the story."

MouseEye just closed his eyes, took a deep breath, then said, "I may have... ummm... overstated... ahhh... the elf's appreciation of my verbal trick."

I crossed my arms. "How overstated?"

"Ummm... he may refer to me as a cheat and a thief."

"So he wasn't amused when you..."

"Ahhh... no."

That cemented my determination. "Great! Then we'll head over there and make amends."

"Must...?"

The "I" petered off. I think MouseEye might have swallowed it.

"Yes. We must. If nothing else, I want to be a good neighbour."

*sigh* "Ok."

And that was that. Off we headed. MouseEye sat on my shoulder the entire way.

The trip was quiet, which suited me just fine. I rehearsed apologies, thought of ways to treat this ancient being that might be appropriate (having no idea of any customs that he might expect me to know, I wondered if I could fake it well enough), and tried to keep issues that might be brought up in mind so that I wouldn't be speechless at any point. It was a lot to think in a short time!

As we got closer to the location of the elf's court, we started to hear a voice, complaining, and apparently in some amount of pain. I sped up, wondering what in the world could be wrong.

The brambles that had obscured the entrance to the courtyard had been ploughed over by something. Certainly something big! And not at all concerned by the prickles of the bushes. I stepped through and a lot more made sense. In the middle of the courtyard laid a sphinx. And not just any sphinx - it was the one I'd encountered a few weeks back. He was bleeding from an open wound in his chest. Kneeling next to him was an elf, speaking softly, tending to him. He glanced up as MouseEye and I strode in, then stood up angrily. 

"I have no time to deal with you, thief. But you are not welcome here. And anyone who accompanies you is equally barred. Begone!"

I glanced at MouseEye sternly. He gave me a helpless shrug back.

"Sir, I'm aware my familiar gave offence earlier and I'm here hoping to heal the rift from that, but I see someone in need of aid. May I be of service?"

He looked at me in annoyance, waved us away, and went back to the sphinx.

Feeling bolder than I had any right to feel, I walked up to the two figures, laid my hand on the sphinx's shoulder, and vowed to return quickly with a healing potion. He thanked me, then said something about never going back, then went back to moaning in pain.

I mentally ran through options for a cure and hit on one - Surgeon Sap. We needed to find a particular tree - a Nurse Willow - and given how thirsty willows can be, I headed towards the boundary between the forest and the bog.

It took a couple of trees to find the right kind and one that had sap congealing on its bark. I gathered a blob then returned to the sphinx.

Re-entering the courtyard, I heard the sphinx breathing easier although the chest wound was still oozing. The elf was chanting something. He looked up and I held up the sap. He nodded for me to approach.

If I'd been at home, I would've heated the sap to allow a portion to be placed, like a poultice, over the wound. Instead, I just had the sphinx swallow the sap whole. It's a little bit sweet so I think that helped it go down.

The wound began to heal as we watched, first drying up, then starting to close. The elf stopped his chant (it was something to ease pain) and the sphinx soon became his healthy self once more.

"I believe I owe you all an explanation.", said the now standing sphinx. "I staggered here from my perch in search of help. You see, I'm a sphinx and by tradition we ask a riddle to anyone who approaches. And by tradition, you can pass if you get the riddle right and you are eaten if you get it wrong. Thanks, however, to the generous nature of the witch before me, I learned that other penalties can be applied, such as the teaching of a new riddle. Which I welcomed because, like I said before, I'm a vegetarian. Anyway, an adventurer approached earlier today. I posed, he answered incorrectly, but instead of teaching me a new riddle, he mocked me! As I began to scold him for his attitude, he stabbed me! He ran off and I made my way here. And thanks to you both, I'm right as rain.

"But I'm never going back to that pedestal. Instead of blocking people from travelling forwards, I'm going to... I'm not sure what."

The noble elf looked thoughtful. "You may reside here with me. I believe we can trade stories for riddles. What say you?"

"Does a bear poop in the woods?"

The elf paused. "And perhaps we can study various forms of riddles and thereby increase your repertoire." He then looked at me. "You, I believe, are Mistress Sweetwater. Your actions were honourable. You are welcome to return here whenever you wish. As for your familiar... I'll consider his debt to me settled once he has told me two stories, not "tales", over the next week."

MouseEye started. "I owed you one!"

The elf answered. "Interest and penalties."

MouseEye shrugged. "Ok. As for the first tale..."

"Let's do this properly. We should sit back, enjoy refreshments, and allow this story to be savoured properly."

I'll say this about what followed - it was an event! MouseEye took centre stage and not only told his stories but acted them out. He did the voices, he brought settings to life, he... let's just say he brought the house down. Twice. And as for the "refreshments" the elf provided... I figured we'd have something refreshing to drink or something like that, but what was served was beyond anything I'd ever had before. Maybe it's because I'd never had Elvish food and this bit of refreshment in the Elvish world was simply that, but I found it simply amazing.

Anyway, whatever bad blood that had existed before was now well and done. Elf and mouse complimented each other, I breathed a sigh of relief, the sphinx trundled off to his new lodgings, and I took that as a cue to excuse myself. All in all, a lovely day.

And it remained lovely despite the fact that somewhere in all this I decided Fen needed a friend. A Princess Toad, to be exact. Why I thought it was a good idea... I don't know! But I did and so off MouseEye and I went in search of one.

We did find Princess Toads. Eventually. There weren't many around and those we did find... well, you can't simply grab them! You have to ask if they'd like to leave their current situation and come join me in mine. To which they all replied, "No, thank you."

You can't argue with that!

We went home, tired but happy. It'd been a busy day. MouseEye settled under the spirit house and I... I was still mentally awake. So I decided to write a response to Pip.

I addressed it To Pip, Here Yet Not Here and sent it From Sweet, Here Yet Not Here

Dear Pip,

Thank you for your kind gift of your chocolate chunk cookies. I'd like to say they were delicious, that they paired nicely with the tea I was drinking. Perhaps MouseEye, when he next sees you, can tell you that they were. Since he's the only one who knows! (The little mischief maker didn't even leave a crumb for me!)

Your cookies may be delightful

And I may be more insightful

Were it not for a mouse

Who lives in my house

Who can apparently eat a plateful!

I think it's funny that you think I'm so adventurous! Not true! But they do have a way of finding me. So rather than me being adventurous, I'd say adventures are Sweet-er-ous!

Pop, by the way, has divided into two! And one of her is now part of the ancient broom I just bought! It's like a holiday-lit broom now!

Your best bestie, 

Sweet 

I figured I'd ask my little half-truth telling, cookie-addicted familiar to deliver it in the morning. But no sooner had I sealed up the letter, I heard a SNAP! That... I'd heard that sound before, during my dream. And the one who'd SNAPped me then had been a small owl...

"Name's Birdie. We needed to talk so here I am. Stay out of my world and I'll stay out of yours. Now give me that note.

"Good talk."

SNAP

And she was gone. What the...? That was... wow. Poor Pip!

I took a second (more like many minutes) to sit and breathe and find my centre again. Then for good measure I went and gave MouseEye a quick peck on the head, and then decided it was time to go to bed.

Also Spring, Week 7 - MouseEye's Adventure

To listen to the narration and hear how I put the episode together, click the video link below:

*****

 I have to admit, I'm not quite sure how to talk about what I just found out. I'm not quite sure who I can tell! I want to tell someone, but it's... have you ever had something that you wanted to say and that it makes perfect sense when you tell someone face-to-face but it just loses its punch when it's written down? Well, I have. I want to tell someone but there's no one here to tell (because I have, apparently, a very discriminating social presence. Meaning I'm pretty much left alone/avoided unless, of course, there's a potion involved).

Which is why I'm sitting here, at my small desk in the cottage, chewing on the end of my pencil, thinking about what to write in a letter to Pip. Of all the people I know, I think she's the only one who'll appreciate the story. But that brings me back to wanting to tell the story face-to-face, maybe in a bit of a gossip session. Not that anyone gossips anymore! Oh no. It's all Speaking Truth and Airing Things Out and Spilling Tea. But it's not gossip!

Ok - I think what I'll do is relate the story on some paper here and if I feel like it comes across ok there, I'll send it to Pip so she can be just as amazed as I am.

Now to compose my letter.

Dear Pip,

Hi! How are you? How's everything in your neck of the Here Yet Not Here?

You won't believe what happened! (Oh, sorry - I'm supposed to wait for you to answer the questions and I'm supposed to listen and nod and pretend I'm not about to burst to tell you what I want to tell you. So pretend I did!) But I think in order to really appreciate the story, you need a clearer picture of life here than what I've provided before.

I live in a small cottage with Pop (she's lightfull, by the way. And I do mean "light-full". She's like my own private floating light source, like a very small sun, but with an automatic dimmer. And no heat aside from her gentle warmth when she lands on me. Thank you for sending Pop O' Lock here - we're all happy) and MouseEye.

MouseEye... how to describe him? He's a mouse, for one. He's my familiar. And while he can often cop an attitude when asked to do something, he can also be helpful - and oftentimes in unexpected ways. For instance, so far I know he can speak to humans, bees, toads, and I'm pretty sure to Pop as well. 

One thing that he has a habit of doing is disappearing. Often at very inconvenient times, like when I'm in danger of being eaten by a sphinx. (Thankfully it was vegetarian, so the danger wasn't as grave as it could've been, but you get the idea). When he shows up after disappearing, I'll ask where he's been. And he'll usually say "Must I?". (I know I asked to call him MouseEye but I had no idea it'd be so close to what has become his trademark remark!)

Today he reappeared in his usual space in and amongst my spirit house (which is also where mail from you tends to arrive. Weird, yeah?). Despite the fact that I've stopped asking about his solo travels far and wide to who knows where, I decided to show an interest on where he'd been this time. And he told me!

That alone made my jaw drop. And maybe it's that fact alone that makes the story so amazing - the he actually shared what happened!

At least I hope it's a true account. It'd be a shame if he just made it all up. I mean... would he make up a story? No - I don't think so. If he didn't want to share, he wouldn't. He'd change the subject or ignore me or say "Must I?". I don't think he's interested in telling tall tales - it's too much work. So I'm going to believe this is true and if it's not... well, I'll just deal with it then.

Oh, look at me - I just looked and realized I've been babbling on without actually saying anything of note yet. It's like I think paper just grows on trees! (And yes, I know, it kinda sorta does!)

Ok. Enough jabbering! To what happened.

I'm going to assume you have a forest in your Here Yet Not Here (I think I'll just write that as HYNH for now. I hope you don't mind!). In my version it's called Glimmerwood Grove. It's a lovely forest, although I must admit I have an affinity for forests. My father's a woodcutter. He lives days away but it's a forest not unlike the one here. Here meaning near my cottage, not here like my side of HYNH. 

Anyway - I went camping in there once. And found a sleeping giant. With the most fungus-covered feet I've ever seen! It was... blech! I mean, I know we witches have to deal with the yucky and nasty parts of life, along with the life-fulfilling and satisfying ones, but still!

Ok - I was supposed to start telling you the story and I got distracted again. This time for sure!

Like I said, MouseEye got back from another one of his solo adventures. It turns out he was exploring Glimmerwood Grove. While he was in there, he found a kind of open-air throne room. He said he just happened upon it - that one second he was stepping, or I suppose padding, through some heavy brambles and ended up stepping into this space. It was all light blue, apparently - sort of like if the sky had been molded into bricks. But it's also apparently old enough to be covered in hanging vines and moss. He said the weird thing was that it all looked so well tended.

Sitting at the other end of the... I suppose it could be called a chamber, although I think chambers are supposed to have some sort of ceiling or roof over them. Anyway, at the opposite end was a throne. And apparently there was no doubting it was a throne because it was big, golden, and elaborate with carvings and ornate decorations. And sitting on the throne was an elf. Now... have I mentioned that MouseEye prides himself on watching and remembering things? This time, however, the self-described watcher was watched by this elf as he looked around and took it all in. And, I guess, the elf was quite amused by MouseEye's wondrous reactions to it all. 

"Welcome to my court.", the elf said in greeting.

"Hello.", MouseEye replied. And continued looking around.

"I am High Lord Aeronil. And you are?"

"MouseEye. You can call me MouseEye."

"And what brings you, MouseEye, to my court and my presence?"

"Hmm...? Oh... nothing. I just stepped through some foliage and ended up here."

"Ah.", was all the elf said.

"Were you hoping for someone in particular?"

The elf's smile dimmed a bit. "I'd hoped that... ah... well, never mind."

MouseEye insists that he turned his magnificent, soulful eyes towards the elf and that that was the reason he became more forthcoming.

"You see... I'd hoped someone would come and replace me here. And you seemed a likely candidate."

"But I thought you said this is your court."

"Ah... technically, it is. Presently. When my replacement takes over, it'll be their court."

"And you thought I was your replacement?"

The elf shrugged. "Stranger things have happened. You could've been a carefully disguised elf."

"How long have you been waiting?"

The elf sat up straighter. "Well... I don't know exactly. Mind you, when you're a member of a long-lived race, such as those of us from Elvendom, long stretches of time can pass by seemingly in an instant."

MouseEye nodded. Then he said, "So how long was that?"

"A long time."

"And you're the only one here?"

"Ah... yes. Yes, I am. The rearguard, I suppose. Of our migration to a new land."

"And so you're waiting on a replacement from the new land where your people are now?"

"That. Or for help in moving the throne. It's quite heavy."

MouseEye nodded in sympathy. "Ok. Well, I should go."

The elf stopped him. "Wait! Would you tarry longer? I'll trade you a tale for a tale."

That stopped MouseEye. "Would you say that your tale is a part of a much larger tale? The Tale of History, I think you could say?"

The elf pondered it. "Yes... I see your point. So - a portion of a tale for a portion of a tale."

"And would you also say that any portion of a tale, in terms of the Tale of History, would be quite a small portion of that tale?"

The elf looked confused, but said, "I don't know where you're going with this, but yes. My tale is but a very small piece of the great Tale of History."

So MouseEye said, "Agreed. You give me a small piece of a tale and I'll do the same and give you a small piece of a tale in return."

Now, I hope you recognize that I've filled in the gaps a bit here and there because, as I mentioned earlier, MouseEye isn't always great with telling me things and can omit some details. So this conversation and agreement may have a bit made up, but in the end MouseEye and the elf agreed to trade bits of a large tale. 

The elf told MouseEye about the history of Count von Rannoc, the necromatic vampire who lives in a dungeon close to the cottage. It's called Hero's Hollow. And I can attest to just how hollow it is! I fell into a jail cell while on my way to the Hollow for the first time! And that was in my first week of being the new witch here! Oh - yeah - I've now been here about two months, so I'm relatively new still, but I've been learning so much and visiting new places and treating all sorts of conditions! It's been fun learning and doing and all that!

And... oh, right! The Count! So it turns out a few hundred years ago, there was this pig farmer. He'd raise pigs, take them to market, or sometimes stay home - you know, all that. Nothing extraordinary. Some days he'd have plenty to eat and could even afford roast beef while other days were lean and there was no food at all. But this one day, when he went to the market, the slaughterhouse took his pigs but refused to pay him! He threatened to go to the police, which is when the mage, who'd been hired by the slaughterhouse for just this sort of thing, said he'd make sure that no one would ever trust him again and that he'd forever after be a creature of the night. He ran all the way home (making some sort of strange "wee wee" noise) but the transformation took hold - he was a vampire from that day forth.

He knew he could never live as a pig farmer again. Or, really, as a farmer at all. So he just ran. And wandered. Eventually he found the dungeon and took up residence there. He became a necromancer to try to find a way to reverse the vampirism. 

This, by the way, is the same vampire who tried to force the spirit of the land under my cottage to bend to his will. For his efforts, the land quite ably defended itself and defeated him, so he only ended up with bruises. 

Anyway, after the elf told his tale, MouseEye said, "That was quite a piece of tale you gave me. I hope you'll find the piece of tale I give you is satisfactory." And then he plucked a few hairs from his tail. "Here's a small piece of tail in return."

Now... I've wondered a time or two during my own adventures if perhaps I was pushing my luck in dealing with those I encounter. But this! This was... oh my! I can't even bring myself to imagine being that bold. And yet there he was, in all his mouse-y glory, holding a bit of fur out in trade for the story.

The elf, for his part, took the proffered hair. "You have played a trick on me. Were I not so bored, I might've taken offence. But this was the only entertainment I've had in ages."

I don't know if MouseEye went anywhere else after that, but as I said, he eventually came home and told me the tale and the tale of the tail.

Whew!

I see I'm getting close to the end of my paper, so I'll close this for now and hope to hear from you soon.

Your Bestie,

Sweet

After a moment's consideration, I folded up the packet of paper, addressed it to Pip, stretched my cramped writing hand, and wondered what she'd thing about this all.

And I'd have a thing or three to ponder over the next few days!

Spring, Week 5 - An Involuntary Foraging Trip

To hear the narration (and learn how I put the episode together), click below:

*****

 I can feel the season coming into its own. That first fresh breeze promising warmer weather and the heat of summer is long past. The feeling of Nature waking up is something I treasure. Funny how things can change so quickly - a change in residence, a definite increase in responsibilities, learning so much in such a short period of time. And yet there's other things that take their time - a change in season, the growth of a tree, even the movement of clouds - and just how easy it is to miss.

I feel like becoming a witch has made me even more aware of all these things, all these changes, fast and slow. And the really funny part is that the best way to notice these changes is to be still. While I can easily keep myself busy doing, I find I prefer not doing. It's been a bit of an exercise keeping my doing and not doing balanced, because both are needed. I find I do because not doing ends. And when my doing is done, I'm back to not doing.

It's a bit weird and I don't know if I'm making sense to anyone (other than to myself, of course. I think!) but it feels good to just sit and observe. My mind does wander while I'm sitting - whether in the cottage by the spirit house or outside in the increasingly warm and green spaces - but that's ok too. It floats along and wanders into all sorts of mental crevices, nooks, even the occasional rabbit hole, but eventually comes back and quiets a bit before dashing off again. Watching my mind meander around is like watching a restless child. It's ok, so long as it's home for meals!

It's been a busy couple of weeks. I've done my best to rest and recuperate, to keep myself happy and healthy, while also being at my best when the need arises. I've enough silver to make a new purchase - I'm sure Bob will be happy to see me and a full purse! Just kidding! Bob is a wonderful person and a smart shopkeeper. I hope to be viewed the same way someday.

Anyway - that will be something to do later this week. Or not. We'll see! For now, I'll sit and breathe. 

*****

At some point, something that I started feeling, grew in my awareness. Something not exactly wrong, but also not quite right.

"MouseEye?"

"Do you feel something too?"

There's nothing so affirming as someone else mentioning feeling something strange without prompting.

"Yeah. And idea what it is?"

"Mmm mmm."

"Do you want to scout around a bit? See if something's amiss?"

As an answer, he closed his eyes. Maybe he didn't say "Must I?" with words, but he yelled it with actions. So I shrugged and decided to walk around.

The sky was clear, the sun shining, nothing out of the ordinary. Except for two things: the bees were less active and sticking closer to the hive, and things felt a little gloomier than they should've. 

It was all subtle and easy to miss, but taken together, something was up. I decided to stay close to the cottage. Which wasn't the idea I'd had for... not today, but maybe tomorrow. I'd taken two weeks to clean up and rest up after difficult cases, which meant I'd spent less time than maybe I should've looking for reagents. And I had wanted to spend some time in Glimmerwood Grove. I guess that would have to wait.

Time passed. The gloom, if anything, deepened. I did my best to sit and be patient. Me pacing the cottage would do me no favours.

The day progressed and still... nothing. The sun set and still... nothing. The sun set? It... no... *sigh*... if a certain necromancer is coming to visit, at least we'll have that out of the way.

"MouseEye? You don't think it's the necromancer, do you?"

He stirred. "If it is, at least we're here. The cottage is safe."

Oh good. I'd've preferred something like, "No - it's not an immortal, blood-sucking, death-magic using creature whose only weaknesses are sunlight, wooden stakes to the heart, and raw garlic.

So we wait. And wait. And...

A knock. On the door.

"Mithtreth? Are you at home?"

Gulp.

MouseEye quickly ran behind the spirit house.

Great.

I called out in response - mostly to delay actually opening the door. "Igor? Is that you?"

"Yeth, mithtreth. The marthter hath need of your thervitheth."

A vampire needs a witch? Well... why not. As I reached for the door, MouseEye jumped on my shoulder, which caused me to jump out of my skin. As I recovered my composure, MouseEye said, "It's safe." Good. Although scaring the stuffing our of me... we could have skipped that bit!

I opened the door. Igor was standing, all three hands gathered together respectfully in front of him, his perpetual smile warm and reassuring. "Mithtreth, pleathe allow me to introduthe my Marthter, Count von Rannoc."

A figure standing behind Igor began to move forward. I expected black and red velvet, a cape, a large necklace depicting a wolf or a bat, all on a towering figure with a smile featuring prominent canines. What emerged was... less. He was pale - that fit the usual depictions. But he was short and stout, wearing a shirt and pants that you might see a labourer wear. There was nothing regal or scary here. Or at least in view. MouseEye's trembling kept me alert.

The Count walked up to me, took my hand, and kissed the back of it. "Count von Rannoc. Pleased to make your acquaintance. And please call me Richard. One's name disappears when buried by titles and honours. Tell me, what may I call you?"

I could feel a gentle push to give him my real name, that here was a friend who would safeguard secrets as if they were his own. So I took a second to shrug that off. "Sweet. Please call me Sweet."

He smiled. It was, for the most part, accepting. But for the remaining part, and echoed by his eyes, not happy that I'd given the answer I had.

I recovered my senses some more. "To what do I owe the visit, Richard?"

He recovered quickly too. "Would you mind if we sit down before I regale you with my tale of misfortune?"

I was getting comfortable with the situation. And that meant I didn't mind taking a minute to ask the cottage before answering. Count Richard might take offence but I was caring less and less. I focused on the cottage and mentally asked for permission. It was granted. So I let the vampire and his assistant in. The Count flashed a quick satisfied grin.

"Isn't it funny - sunlight is unhealthy for me but I can enjoy a lovely fire. Thank you for allowing me in." The Count was once again being charming. But I wasn't fooled. Something was going on.

"Please take a seat. May I offer you some tea?"

"Tea? Delighted."

"And for you, Igor?"

"Yeth, pleathe."

With the social niceties out of the way, it was time to find out what was going on. "You mentioned a tale of misfortune, Richard?"

He sipped and savoured before responding. "Wonderful cup of tea. Thank you. So yes - why I'm here. As you probably know, being a witch, that I am... differently alive than others. In addition, my interest in exploring the boundary between this world and the one where the deceased travel to requires the use of silver. Did you know of its qualities of calling forth the energies of the moon? Yes? Yes - of course you do. Well - what no one mentions in any of the tomes I have - have you been in my library? You've seen my collection of books - that silver can irritate, not just skin, but the entire body and, what's more, the esoteric body. So I have a need for a cure. And that brings me to you."

On the surface, it sounded good. Sincere. Someone needing help. But couldn't that help come from, oh I don't know, the Igor with the fully stocked laboratory? So I called him on it.

"It'th unfortunate, but my thkillth are thentered around necromatic artth, not allergieth." With a slight, perhaps even disapproving, glance at the Count.

"Igor", the Count replied, "We've discussed this. This is not an allergy. It is a chronic condition from over-exposure. As you well know from the summoning of Askew." Then he glanced at me. "Ah, sorry - you wouldn't know. Askew is a minor demon. I consulted it in regards to my affliction and it assured me you could effect a cure."

Right. "Please enjoy some more tea. I'll be just a second." I got up and began consulting the old witch's book. As I came up with a plan, I heard the Count remark on my spirit house. "It's lovely how you honour... your ancestors? the grounds? What does this symbolize?"

Without thinking, I replied, "The cottage and grounds."

"Is that so?"

I cringed. I'm not sure what he's hunting for, but apparently he just found something helpful.

I turned my mind back to the condition at hand. Silver Burn. Definitely a thing. And not an easy nut to crack. Thankfully I already had one reagent, Ghost Goo. For the other, I had a few choices... I think I muttered Glimmerwood Grove as I read.

"Will your hunt for reagents take you  to the Grove?" I heard the Count ask.

I just nodded.

He paused for a minute. "Lovely place. Full of reagents."

I nodded again.

"And I'm in no hurry for a cure."

Did he know I had been thinking of going there? Was that demon the one who told him? "I had been thinking about a reagent gathering... expedition is far too grand a word. But..."

"Wonderful! That sounds productive. And relaxing. I heartily endorse it!"

"Yes, but..."

"And I insist you take Igor with you. He'll cook and clean for you - whatever you want. Isn't that right, Igor?"

Was there a pause? "Yeth, Marthter. Of courthe, Marthter."

The Count smiled. "Wonderful! It's all decided. And of course you don't want to wait, do you, Sweet?"

I just nodded again.

"Right. Gather your things and off you go."

And I did and I did. It was only after I was halfway there that I realized I hadn't actually wanted to leave at all. I was so frustrated, angry, disgusted in myself, just... I wanted to scream. But I also wanted to talk to MouseEye, but with Igor around, I knew MouseEye wouldn't appear. So I stopped to go to the bathroom, asked Igor to keep going, and said I'd catch up in a minute.

I squatted down in a place so I could make sure Igor kept on walking. After I made sure he wasn't around, I whispered, "MouseEye?"

"Clever using the 'I need to pee trick'."

"Thanks. It helps to know I've got my brain back. I felt like I was pushed out the door."

"Um... you were. But not by the vampire. I think the cottage got you out of there."

That stopped me. "Seriously?"

"He wanted in and the cottage let it happen. I think whatever happens there, it'll be safer for you out here. Focus on the potion - he wasn't making that up. And when you feel ready, then we'll head back. Hopefully, things will be resolved. And in our favour."

Note to self - all this hoping that things will work out is for the birds. Or the snails. For something and/or someone who's not me. I'd prefer certainty, especially here and now!

Anyway, I finished my fake pee stop and caught up to Igor. He didn't look happy. So I asked if there was anything the matter.

"Kind of you to athk. I... I don't with to thay anything againtht the marthter, but hith conduct lately hath been in violation of the Igor Code. And thith excurthion, begging your forgiveneth, ith right up there. I'm thuppothed to care for mathter'th needth, not thimply to enthure you..."

"That I what, Igor? Come to harm?"

"Oh! No, mithtreth! No harm ith to come to you."

"Then why are you here?"

"Loothe lipth think thipth. I've already thaid too much."

"He wanted into the cottage. He's looking for something."

"The entity that ith the cottage and groundth. He became aware of it with the latht witch."

"And so...?"

"Tho what? You'll cure him of hith allergy. Huh! Allergy! What thelf-rethpecting necromancer hath a thilver allergy? Thameful."

"I will?"

"Yeth, mithtreth, you will. Not becauthe of any threat, but becauthe, in your heart of heartth, you heal. It'th what you want to do. And I'm here to help you do it. Jutht... maybe take longer than thtrickly nethethary."

"And yet you don't want to help me. You want to help the Count."

"That, mithtreth, ith my burden to bear. For now."

And that was that. Whether I liked it or not, I had Igor helping me find reagents in the forest while a vampiric necromancer attacked my cottage. And my cottage, by the way, wanted me out of the way. I had no idea how I was supposed to feel about all of this. So I decided to get to work gathering so that when I felt the time was right, I'd be able to go home right away.

"Okay, Igor. I can't say I understand any of what's going on, but you are right that I'm not interested in whatever magical battle of wits is happening. So I'll focus on what I can do, which is focus on making potions and all that involves, and let everything play out as it will. I'm going to trust that everything works out ok. So let's get to the Grove and set up camp. It's getting late and I'd really like to hit the ground running tomorrow. How's that sound?"

"Like a well thought-out plan, mithtreth."

*****

That plan worked well for us. Although there was also a fair bit of luck involved. You see, we finished making our way to the Grove, the trees all rising high over our heads, branches outstretched, nighttime animals making their nighttime noises (funny how scary they can be heading to the Hollow and yet so soothing in the Grove). We found a clearing and set up camp by a couple of big rocks that were the start of a couple of low ridges, forming a bit of a valley. It was tight, that valley, so we set up at the mouth of it. It also allowed for some fresher air. Inside the valley, the air didn't move much and had an unpleasant earthy smell. And that's where we spent the first night.

When we awoke the next morning, we decided to move camp. Quietly. Because the "rocks" we camped next to weren't rocks. They were feet. Giant's feet. I don't know how we avoided being trampled or otherwise rolled on. Thankfully the giant is a heavy sleeper. 

Once we had the new camp set up, I went back and carefully picked Foot Fungus - a powerful reagent. I tried to not sneeze and was almost successful. But the giant slept through it all.

I do not look forward to contending with an awake giant. Fingers crossed I never do.

Over the course of a couple of days, we gathered pretty much everything I wanted to bring back.

We put our new camp near a copse of Nurse Willows, where I harvested Surgeon Sap. Apart from being a convenient camp for ourselves, we also got to watch as a couple of animals, wounded from, I suppose, territorial fights, battles with predators, and who knows what else, came to lick the trees and effect their own healing.

One of these animals was a boar. It was in really bad shape, not even being able to reach a tree - it just laid down a few metres away, looked piteously at them, and whimpered. I was able to gather a bit of additional sap and cautiously fed it. As it lay there waiting for the sap to work its magic, I gave it some pets and was rewarded with some of its hair. Hair of the Boar was another reagent I'd hoped to gather.

Near a quick-flowing creek, as we gathered water, there was some splashing as something tried to avoid us. At first I thought it was a fish. Turns out it was Scramble Bramble. If it hadn't been for its trying to get away, I never would've known it was there. I managed to catch a bit.

On a prior trip here, I'd encountered some pixies near some Songberry bushes. I headed that way again. The pixies were once again gathered there. It was a bit awkward, with plenty of not-very-quiet mutterings about how I'd cheated at Caber Toss. I tried to put on a friendly face. I guess it worked because I was able to talk to a pixie who was, on the face of it, personable. Or should that be pixieable? How about we go with civil.

With her help, we gathered Songberries (they're just so good for mood). And she directed me to Shieldcap - several pixies were trying on different mushroom caps for fit and comfort. And colour - getting the right shade was a big part of the discussions there.

I was about to head back to the pixie gathering when I heard the strangest rhythm: tap, tap, shuffle, tap, tap, pounce, croak. Peering around a few trees, I saw these weird pink toads, gathered in small groups, dancing. It was funny to watch, that they did it with such solemnity, I had to guess it was some sort of... I don't know... courtship dance maybe? Like trying to impress the other toads with their... big jumps maybe? Dancing skills? Ability to get down and boogie? But a serious boogie. Anyway, I watched for a good long while. At some point it finished and I was able to collect mucous off overhanging leaves and (and I can't believe I'm writing this) their poop. Just call me the Princess Toad Latrine Girl.

I did eventually return to the pixies. I noticed everyone was drinking something warm and rich-smelling. When I asked what it was, I was told it was Coffee Cap, that it grew over that-a-way and that I could go get some now since it was time for me to leave. Although I'd hoped to get some more Rat Spit before heading off, I suppose I should be happy that they merely told me to leave rather than curse me. So... Coffee Cap - yes! Rat Spit - no!

Like I said, it'd been a couple of days. They were good, productive days. Igor kept the camp running well, and in fact is quite the chef. I don't think I've eaten as well, out here in the forest, as I have in my time in the cottage. "Ah well, you know", he said when I complemented his culinary skills, "it'th alwayth thatithfying to cook for more than jutht yourthelf. The marthter, you know, doethn't eat anything. He provideth for hith own nourithment. Tho I'm having fun cooking for thuch an apprethiative mithtress."

At some point, after another filling meal, I found myself asking about the old witch's interest with the Count. "It wathn't thomething I wath privy to. It ith a bit... odd... to theek out the company of a vampire, or a necromanther, or both, but thee did. The marthter, I think he enjoyed the company. The dead, near-dead, theudo-dead, thorta-dead... did you know necromanthers have fifty words for dead and death?... anyway, they aren't much for converthation. And it'th above my thtathion to thpeak to the marthter. Tho I think he got lonely on occathion. He may even have lotht a bit of hith pathion for the work. Thuth my fear he'd abandon it and leave with her. Tho along with hiding her letter to him, I kept giving her a Travel Guide to the The Imperial Thity. I hope thee's enjoying it there."

Well... that explains a lot.

I was going to ask more about that when I got a feeling. A request to return. And not to wait. I took a minute to pretend to relieve myself so that I could ask MouseEye if he'd felt anything. He had.

I strode confidently to Igor and let him know that I felt it was time to head home. He took one look at me, said, "Yeth, Mithtrith", and we quickly packed up and started back.

Just like our walk out, it was dark heading back. I was certainly walking faster heading back home, or what I hope was still my home, partly out of a desire to be in the cottage again and partly out of trepidation of what I'd find.

The cottage was quiet and still as we approached. Light did glow out from the windows and smoke and the occasional ember rose out of the chimney. Nothing out of the ordinary. 

I opened the door and found everything as I'd left it. Nothing broken, no mess, no disorder. Sitting at my table was the vampire, Richard, looking at me. Not violent. Not angry. No animosity showing. Just... abashed, I think. Bemused. Even sheepish. "Good evening, Mistress Sweetwater. I owe you an apology and an explanation.

"First, the explanation. When I became aware of the spirit that resides here, and I believe you've begun calling it also "not here", I felt I had to explore the phenomenon. What I didn't realize was the extent of that energy, nor of its desire for its privacy and ability to defend itself from unwanted intrusion. I've already tendered my apologies to the entity, and now I do so to you. Frankly, I had thought you, an unassuming girl, wouldn't be aware of the energies and that I could take advantage of that. I was wrong. I'm truly sorry to have disturbed you and this place."

"And why are you telling me this?"

"Because that was part of the agreement I made to cease hostilities. To be blunt, in the battle of wills between myself and the entity, I was suddenly beset by the most noxious, odious, little creatures I've ever encountered. Vicious little things."

"They're probably the result of poisoning the doctor."

"Really? Comeuppance too, in the mix. Fitting, I suppose."

I just stood there, watching, listening, processing.

"However, I would be most obliged if you could prepare that cure for Silver Burn. I have money."

I glanced at the spirit house. MouseEye peered out from it, all smiles. He gave me a sign that it was ok to brew it up. It meant having Richard in my house for longer than I wanted, but I did quickly brew it.

He applied it to his hands, then drank the rest. A look of relief crossed his face. "Thank you. Here's your fee. And please know I meant you no harm." And with that, he headed for the door. Before he left, he looked over his shoulder. "I cleaned up as best as I could. Would you like Igor to give it a once-over? The mess those little creatures can spread is... nauseatingly impressive. Please excuse any mess I missed. Now, allow me to bid you adieu."

I sat down in my chair and looked up at the spirit house again. "Will you tell me what happened?" The feeling I got back was one of comfort, security, warmth. The feelings a child might get from a parent who won't share the events of the day but gives reassurance instead.

I sat and watched the fire slowly die down to embers, then out, leaving me in the comforting dark of the cottage.

Spring, Week 2 - I Become Mistress Sweetwater. And Cure Madame Hightower.

Here's the video on how I wrote Spring, Week 2, Cure:

 I found myself wondering, once again, if I'd made a foolish choice in staying in the witch's cottage. It had been more than a week already and I could feel my uncertainty filling the future. Did I really want those feelings of being someone apart from the rest of humanity? Yes, the cottage and grounds are peaceful, but at some point we all want companionship.

Unwilling mouse-y familiars don't count.

Nor do grumpy disbelievers in my ability to help them through their various ills and ailments. 

Nor do... *sigh*... I guess I'm just feeling sorry for myself.

Who am I kidding - stepping into the role of local witch without having a clear idea of what I'm doing. Let's face it - I'm making it up as I go along. *Ugh!*

Maybe I need a hobby. Like taking care of things here isn't enough.

Maybe I...

"Hi. You busy?"

MouseEye. He tries, I think. Maybe my expectations, my hopes, and my dreams are just getting in the way. Maybe if I...

He jumped onto my shoulder then tapped on the side of my head. "Hello! Is anyone home?"

Somewhere in there I should have counted to ten before answering but I didn't give myself that space. So a bit more sharply than I should've, I answered. "Yes? What is it? What's so important?"

He twitched his whiskers. He was irritated too. And I was probably the cause. *ugh* But kudos to him - he swallowed a sarcastic comeback and got to the important thing he wanted to bring up. "Something we've never discussed is what I should call you."

And he was right. I'd never thought of telling him my name. "Oh! Well, it's..."

He quickly interrupted. "Not your real name. Real names have power. If someone knows your real name, they can have power over you. "Witch" is your job, your title, but won't suffice as a name. Is there a name that speaks to you, that you can call yourself, and that others can use?"

I'd never given it much thought. Any thought, really. A name not my own that I'd make mine. It was a new and novel concept, one that was just so foreign. I wonder how someone goes about doing something like that. Would I need another trip to the Glimmerwood Grove to ask for one? Would I have received one at the school, if I hadn't left, that is. Maybe...

"You have five minutes. So just ask yourself and find yourself a name."

"I what? Why...? Five minutes before what?"

"Four minutes."

"I...!"

Mental turmoil galore! But within all that, all the confusion and the unknown and a demanding mouse and an uncertain future and a past rapidly receding and choices becoming more and more permanent... I heard myself use a name. Mistress Sweetwater.

"Three minutes."

"Mistress Sweetwater!", I shouted.

He paused, then murmured, "Mistress Sweetwater. Madame Sweetwater. Mother Sweetwater. Granny Sweetwater. Yup - all sounds good. It works, Mistress Sweetwater."

And that was that. I had a new name. And never would I use the old one again.

So... if I had a new name, did that mean... "MouseEye? What's your real name?"

And he just looked at me. "I'm here to help you, to the degree that I want and can do. Telling you my real name isn't part of the deal.

"Oh - and the rush is because someone is coming down the path."

And with that, there was a voice calling from outside the cottage. "Hello? Miss New Witch? I require help!" and then she knocked on the door.

I flashed a look at MouseEye. "You could've told me she was coming!", I hissed.

"I did. With five minutes to spare."

As I reached for the door handle, MouseEye said, "Smile!"

Grrrr... but I did smile as I opened the door. Or at least I tried. Not that she noticed - she barged through the door and past me.

"Where's your mistress, girl? Don't just stand there - I'm in a hurry and my time is invaluable."

My smile became more strained. "I'm Mistress Sweetwater, the new witch. How can I help you?"

She turned and looked at me. "No, girl, you misunderstand. My maid, Francie, said that you are the domestic here. I'm looking for the new witch what cured the miller's boy of his warty lips."

Ah. Well that helps explain things. "I cured him."

She just stared at me. Then, "Well? Are you going to help me or must I go elsewhere for help?"

That smile was now very forced. "I'd love to help you, Madame...?"

Her eyes narrowed to slits. "Hightower. Madame Hightower. As everyone in this part of the world knows. Or should know. Now - you will help me."

This was too much. "Certainly, Madame." I probably added too much obvious snark into that "Madame". "If only you'd tell me what your affliction is."

"Hmph! Should have known a little slip of a girl wouldn't know her stuff. If you were worth anything, you'd know just from my visage."

Her visage? Her face. Something amiss on this horrible person's face. A cursory look didn't reveal anything. "What...?"

"Oh for heavens sake! This! Right here! As clear as the nose on your face!"

She was pointing at her nose. I took a closer look and saw a tiny wart.

"Have you tried kissing frogs?", I asked.

Her eyes blazed. "The effrontery of such a question! No, I haven't been kissing frogs. Nor rubbing them on my nose. It just appeared, marring my flawless complexion, and I'm to host a small gathering of close acquaintances in a few days. What am I do do?"

Her angry facade gave way to anguish. Angruish, to coin a term. Frankly, I didn't see what the big deal was.

"And of course I will pay handsomely for a cure."

Well - there was my motivation. Not a great one, but the coin would help smooth my trampled feelings. "Ok. I'll get to work on a cure. You can go home and I'll..."

"Absolutely not!" The imperious bitch re-emerged. "I'll stay here, thank you very much, and ensure that you effect a cure post haste."

Um... ah...

"I will sleep on this bed and stay here until I am cured and can face society again."

Will you now? Fine. Then I think I'll take my time in making this potion. But first I need a diagnosis. And for that, I need to know...

"Is it only the rhino-wart? Or are there others?"

"A rhino-sized wart!?! How dare you! I...!!!"

"The 'rhino-' refers to the nose. I was asking if you have any other warts besides the one on your nose."

That seemed to mollify her a bit.

"Ah. I see. A medical term. Frankly, you surprised me. But - no. No other warts."

 I turned to the book. MouseEye was there, out of sight from Madame Hightower. Quickly we identified her affliction: Toad Nose.

As we worked through the needed reagents, I found myself asking myself if there was something going on in the vicinity. First frog warts and now toad warts? Strange.

I turned back to my impatient patient. "I need to gather reagents. Please stay here - where I need to go is very dangerous. But I will return with the ingredients needed to cure you."

"You are certain you can eliminate my disfiguration?"

"Yes. And in time for your party. But please be patient in the meantime." And with that, I gathered my things and headed out. 

Our first stop: Meltwater Loch.

As we made our way to the Loch and gathering, not just what we needed for treating my newest patient (who was helping me realize the connection between "patient" and "patience" - the one I needed more of and the other... I also needed more of. The first will come in time, if I continue to do a good job, but the other was all up to me. And regardless of anything else, that is surely not a subject covered in that school.

Nope! this is something that requires experiences and none were to be had behind a desk, playing at potion making, whereas here I am, tromping around on a warm Spring day, on my way to gather this and that at the Loch. Oh if only my family could see me now, going from no prospects in the far off woods to being someone counted upon, someone respected, someone...

"Hey! What's that?"

What's what? I looked around to see where we were. We'd just come out onto a beach. "Where are you looking, MouseEye?"

"Right in front of you. In the sand."

Sometime, and hopefully some time soon, I'll learn to pay attention to where I am, to where I'm going, and to the very large tracks that look like a massive dog walked into the water. My first thought was gratitude for not meeting whatever it was that made those tracks. My next thought of gratitude is that they went down the beach and into the water. Had they been pointed the other way, I would have been scared of it wanting to go back into the Loch but stopping for a small witch lunch first.

I ventured, "A dog?"

MouseEye looked at me. "That big?"

"A large dogfish?"

We both stared at the tracks for a minute. Then I said, "What do you think the chances are that it's alone. You know - no mate, no little large dogfish?"

We both listened intently. A gentle lapping of surf, insects buzzing, birds chirping, the safe sounds of a beach were all we heard. Certainly no crashing through foliage, no loud breath bubbles in the water, no signs anything would give us grief. That was a relief.

Despite the feeling that we were safe, I still had MouseEye keep lookout. After all, he says he's good at watching. So - watch out for danger! He took up position on a cliff edge while I started gathering reagents.

First up - Smooth Croak. It was an amazing ingredient last time so I went with it again. Besides, finding the frogs, so iridescently colourful, was most of the joy in gathering it. Collecting the mucous that coats those beautiful skins was less so.

And that was all I needed from here. But since I was determined to take my own sweet time with the cure, I also gathered some extra things. Like wigfish. How can you not grab the seaweed wigs the fish put on their heads when they just parade back and forth in the water, desperate for attention? Although it's possible they were hoping I'd be some sort of beauty judge.

The reason I'm only half-kidding about the beauty show judge thing is that they, each of them, emerged from behind a grove of deep reed. After I'd taken a wig, the fish disappeared, leaving me free to harvest a branch or two of the reeds.

As I prepared to gather up some gas weed (which had floated up to the surface from the depths) and also slime shell (because apparently I hadn't gotten my hands on enough slimy stuff after gathering the smooth croak), I called up to MouseEye to check out Gimmerwood Grove before we headed that way together. After getting through the seemingly required "Must I?", I set to collecting the last reagents.

While I waited for the all clear, I decided to dry off and warm up by lying on the beach and soaking up the sun.

I found myself, besides keeping an ear out for giant dogfish, staring up at the clouds. They were all puffy and white. What would it be like to fly up there? Wouldn't it be the same feeling of cold and wet like what happens when it's foggy? Would they be more solid? Could you turn clouds into thread and then into fabric? Imagine a set of clothes made from cloud cloth! Would they be light as air? Could I maybe one day fly to them? Or maybe I could just climb Moonbreaker Mountain and do it that way. I could maybe...

"Good morning, sleepy head." And then a pressure landed on my chest. Opening my eyes, there was an impudent mouse staring at me.

I tried to speak but between the sun, the sand, and my mouth being wide open while I napped, all I had was cotton in my mouth. And not cottony-soft cloud - nope - this was full-on cotton sand, the ultimate drying agent.

After taking some refreshing gulps of Loch water, I was finally able to ask about Glimmerwood Grove. "It's all good. And there's a group that wants to play a friendly game with you."

I should have asked who the group was and what game they wanted to play, but I figured I'd find out in a little bit anyway.

Reminder to self - ask the questions beforehand.

When we got to the Grove, there was indeed a group who challenged me to a game. Caber toss. Thankfully, the group was a group of pixies. If it'd been trolls, or really anything much bigger than me, I'd have lost of a certainty.

As we set up for the game - getting the "log" (much more like a large stick) ready for tossing - the pixies started taunting me. It was good-natured, but they insisted that there be a small wager on the outcome. They said that the old witch would routinely lose and that she'd pay off her debt with a fresh reagent. They also let me know that if I refused to give a reagent, they'd lay a curse on me! There was at least one pixie who really wanted to practice their curse-craft.

Inspired by their attitude, especially the expectation I'd throw the game, I threw the caber farther than I ever would've dreamed I could. Pixie jaws dropped.

"I suppose you won fair and square. Although I wonder why - the old witch supported us with fresh reagents and needed an excuse so she'd lose at the caber toss. Ah well..." And they turned to go.

"Ahem. Aren't you forgetting something?" I wondered if I crossed my arms, tapped my feet, or pursed my lips, if I'd look more imposing.

One of the pixies reluctantly reached into a pouch. "Fair's fair. I suppose." And with that, he handed me ten silver. And then they left in a huff.

After they'd gone, I looked for MouseEye. "Pixies? Caber toss? Are you kidding me?" I must admit I got pretty shrill.

"Granted, ok. But ten silver is nothing to sneeze at. And did you know the old witch was a pixie caber toss team supporter? That's something. So all in all, it all worked out. Thanks to me. And your bulging biceps, of course."

We both knew that I don't really have biceps, let alone ones that bulge. My dad? Arms bigger than my whole body. Me? Thin as reeds.

"Come on. Let's get to work. These things won't gather themselves."

After walking a bit, we started hearing singing. Unearthly singing. God-awful unearthly singing. Drunk fairies. If you've never heard drunk fairies before, they're just like regular fairies but using dirty lyrics, out-of-tune melodies, and harmonies that can knock birds unconcsious.

I think I heard this one:

There once was a man from Glasnee

Who's prick was the size of a flea

   You'd think never under heaven

   That it could plant a bun in the oven

Yet it just made wee bairn number twenty-three 

Yup, drunk fairies.

The thing about drunk fairies is you can pretend to be just about anything and they'll believe it. For instance, this is how our little conversation went:

"Hey! Who're you?"

"I'm a Fairy Good Witch here to harvest some songberries because they're so ripe and sweet."

"Oh, aye. I recognize you! Sure, go ahead."

While I picked a few, I couldn't help but notice some rats in cages off to the side. I had to ask. "What are you doing with the rats?"

"Training them! Fastest rats you'll ever see!"

"May I have some of their spit?" Rat spit is fantastic for teeth.

"Um... sure... but it won't make you any faster."

"I'm sure that's ok."

A small vial of rat spit later and I was ready to head home and on to kicking someone out of the cottage.

Home. Did I just call the cottage "home"? I guess I did. So I guess it's time to start treating it not as a guest would but as an owner would. And hopefully the old witch, when she returns, will appreciate my efforts.

It was with that in mind that I headed back. Yes, I'd shown her that I wouldn't be rushed but I was tired, hungry, and so ready for a bath and bed. But first, a potion.

As I approached the cottage, Francie yelled out to me from the wood chopping block. "Hello, Mistress! O, my lady will be so happy to see you back! How was your adventures of getting your things? Why didn't you tell me that you're really a witch? Why would someone who's so clearly skilled need lessons in healing the misfortunes of others? Oh! I should alert my lady you're back!"

Was I gone for so long that Madame Hightower needed her maid? Ok - yeah. Probably. So that's two people who can vacate as soon as I've got the potion prepared.

I entered the cottage - my cottage, I amended - and was met with the expected imperious demands. "Where have you been? Did you want me to die of exposure and starvation? I had to bring Francie here to keep me safe and sound. And what have you done? Nothing! Except, perhaps, gather things."

Something in there brought me up short. "I asked you to wait at home. You refused. But you went back home to bring your servant here?"

"Well, of course! I couldn't leave you to your own devices without my supervision and yet I needed someone to take care of all the little duties while you were away."

I decided not to press it. Instead, I asked Francie to get the fire stoked.

"You will not give directions to my servant, young lady! If you have need of something, I expect you to do it. It's what I'm paying for, after all."

Sealing my lips so tight that they must have turned a blinding white. I got the fire up to boil the smooth croak mucous. As it boiled, I crushed the songberries and let them sit in the mortar - I figured letting the air into the juice would enhance its sweetness.

It felt like it took forever, what with scowls from one and poorly-contained excitement from the other, but eventually I'd poured the two together and thus finalized the potion.

Madame Hightower held her nose as she started to drink, but then eagerly downed the rest. The songberries really were quite sweet.

After she'd downed the last of it, she sat down heavily onto my bed. She looked dazed.

Yeah - I was worried something had gone wrong and was getting ready to do... I really don't know what I would've done. But she looked at me and for the first time since arriving, was actually nice.

"You make a wonderfully tasting healing concoction, Mistress Sweetwater. My thanks to you. I believe this is your going rate, plus let me add a bit extra for the delightful taste." Twenty-four silver! Isn't that lovely. But isn't it really lovely just how she changed. Those songberries and its mood-enhancing properties - golden.

Francie then rushed to her mistress' side. "My lady! Your wart is gone!"

The lady looked at her maid. "I have no doubt this lovely new witch achieved a cure."

As she and Francie made their way out the door, Madame Hightower looked back at me. "At the party I'll be hosting, I expect Mrs. Ruffage, the head mistress of the herbology school, will be there. I believe she's the old witch's cousin. I'll be sure to put in a good word. I'm sure she'll be pleased to hear that you are filling in so ably. Good day to you."

And that was that. No invitation, though. Although, to be honest, I would have declined. Still, it would've been nice to have been asked.

After the ladies had left, I finally turned to MouseEye. "Well, we're home. Our home." MouseEye just curled up near the fire. "Mmmhmmm. That's nice." Then mouse-y snores quickly followed.

You know what? Food and bath can wait. I laid down on the bed without bothering to undress first. That's something you can do in your own home.